How to Bring the Spark Back To Your Relationship

re-sparking a good relationship

If you’ve been in a long-term relationship for some time, you probably know that, at least sometimes, it can feel less fun than it did at the beginning.

Although you become more comfortable with your partner and know more about them (which is a great bonus), you perhaps don’t have quite the same level of spontaneity or excitement. It may feel like the romance, while perhaps not completely gone, is not as pronounced as it used to be.

How can you bring that spark back into your relationship? If you’ve been together a while, all it should take is a little extra effort on both your parts to:

-Go on dates

-Attend events

-Remember romantic gestures

-Talk about important things

-Create shared friendships

Set Up Fun Dates

Sometimes, a long-term relationship means having fewer dates and romantic gestures. Because you’re already comfortable with each other, you often don’t make the effort to actually go through with romantic gestures like making reservations for a night out.

The good news is, this is actually pretty easy. You just have to make reservations at a restaurant the two of you enjoy and go out for a night together. If you want to make it really special, consider booking a reservation at a really fancy restaurant and dressing up in your finest clothes for your date.

Go to an Event Together

Spending time out of the house as a couple is a great way to have fun with each other, and it’s also a useful way to keep that spark alive. To that end, up the ante of the aforementioned date night, and consider going to a bigger event together. It can be a casual event, like a night at a local bar, or a more formal event like a night at the theater or going to a concert.

When you go to an event together, you get to have some time around other people and really show off your relationship. That’s a great way to feel closer together. Plus, it can be romantic to have a night out where you get to meet other people and introduce yourself as a couple.

Surprise Each Other With Romantic Gestures

Surprise is a big element of the “spark” you feel in the early years of your relationship. Because you know the other person so well now, you might not ever think about surprising that person with a gift or a date that you didn’t tell the person beforehand.

The thing is, this can be a great way to improve your relationship. If you put in the work to surprise your spouse with something, be it a gift or a night out on the town, it shows you truly value your relationship. That can be a big deal if you don’t traditionally do this sort of thing for each other.

Talk About More Than Just Your Day

It’s pretty common to talk to your partner about what happened during the day. Especially if you go to different jobs and do different things all day, debriefing at the end of the day is a great way to bond. But in many long-term relationships, that’s all you end up talking about: your day.

Instead of that, try to talk about more things that happened to you or things you’re interested in. Did you see a trailer for a movie that interested you? What happened on the bus on the way home? Expand past the typical conversations you might normally have and talk more about fun things–your inside jokes, weird “what-if” scenarios–like you probably did at the beginning of the relationship.

In doing so, you may find yourself still learning new things about your partner. And you will help to nurture the shared sense of humor that’s so important to any long-term relationship.

Become Part of the Community

It’s always nice to become part of the community around you, especially when you’re with a partner. After all, those people may be part of your life for a significant amount of time, and getting to know them allows you to feel like you’re genuinely in touch with the people around you. And the endeavor of forming new friendships can only help to cement your own partnership.

But before you reach out to others in your community, consider using a site like PeopleFinders first to try and make sure they’re safe.

Although most of your neighbors will be perfectly safe to talk to and hang out with, there’s no harm in checking to make sure. With PeopleFinders, you can perform an address lookup to try and learn more about your neighbors. If you want to dig a little deeper, a background check may help you find out even more about those neighbors before you start to make friends.


It’s actually easier to keep the spark alive in a long-term relationship than you might think. Try out these tips, and it may surprise you how much different you feel with your partner, no matter how long you’ve been together.

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