You know that just disappearing from someone’s life isn’t the right way to end a relationship. However, it seems that not everyone knows this (more likely, they don’t care). Of course, in the days before the internet, “ghosting,” or the act of simply disappearing from someone’s life rather than actually approaching the person and breaking up, was almost nonexistent. The rare times that it happened, it was usually someone skipping town after making an awful lot of promises to an awful lot of people.
However, in the modern age, where it’s easy to block someone on all your social media on a moment’s notice, ghosting is actually strangely common. One informal study turned up the statistic that 50% of both men and women have ghosted at least one person in the past. The facts don’t make it hurt any less when it happens to you, though. Here are some tips on what to do when you realize you’ve been ghosted.
Recognize That It’s Okay to Be Upset
Just telling yourself that you’re not upset won’t really do anything. In fact, denying the frustration, pain, or even anger you’re feeling can do more harm than good. Don’t do anything silly or irreversible; however, you might find comfort in sitting down with a friend and just talking about what happened. By talking things out, you’ll probably be able to realize why you’re so upset, and what you might be able to do to feel better. Maybe you’re upset because you’ve been ghosted before, and you feel like it’s your fault somehow. Perhaps you genuinely thought the relationship was getting serious. Whatever it is, recognize that your feelings are valid. That’s the only way you’ll ever end up getting past it.
There are a Lot of Fish in the Sea
Especially if you’ve been ghosted by someone you thought you were getting really close to, it can be tempting to give up hope. You might be frustrated by your lack of romantic success, or just frustrated that you put so much work into a relationship, only to be left with no explanation. Take solace in the fact that you have plenty of options! Even if you’re planning to go back into the dating scene, know that the odds are currently in your favor since you’re coming off a bad experience. Remember that 50% have never ghosted anyone. And even with those that have, what are the chances that you find another person that ends up doing it to you?
Try to Find Closure in Another Way
If you’re a person who really likes closure, you might not want to just let things go and never talk to this person again. Sure, that person may just be mean-spirited for no reason, but maybe he or she is just bad at breaking off relationships. If you want to get in contact, but don’t necessarily want the person to be able to respond, you may decide to write a letter. For that, you’ll want to use a people search site like PeopleFinders.
PeopleFinders is the best way to find contact information for someone you need to get in touch with. If you were close enough to be texting when the person ghosted you, use the reverse phone search to get a wealth of information, including a full name and home address. If you know a first and last name, as well as the city and state of residence, you can use the public records search to get all kinds of information. That’s not all PeopleFinders can help you with. You can read the PeopleFinders blog to get more ideas about relationships and communication. Whatever you’re doing with your love life, personal life, or work life, PeopleFinders can help.
It always hurts to be dumped, and being dumped completely out of the blue, with no real information on why, is even harder. However, it doesn’t have to be so bad that ruins your life completely. You can move on and be happy, even if you were very close to that person at the time. If you want to seek closure, use PeopleFinders to find the person’s address, and send a thoughtful, well-worded letter. There’s no reason to keep thinking about this person. Write that letter and move on.
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